D20 Random Lunatic Hermits

Recently I got to thinking about Death frost Doom again, specifically as a representative of a definitive OSR (No I don't know what 'OSR' means) product that plays well on an 80's D&D ruleset (or retro-clone, whatever) but is nothing like an 80's D&D module.  I've been reading some of those things lately - and am still fuming about the apparently beloved "Pharaoh - I4" (which takes a cliched setting so brimming with life and reduces it to a limp grey ghoul confusedly wandering a 10' x 10' room).  Death Frost Doom is not without places to tweak and reskin it to make it better, and it may demand a bit much from a GM (or play testing has shown that it's end game isn't as final as the author originally believed so some additional material would be helpful), but it's a great little adventure well worth dropping on any sandbox map. 

One of the best parts of Death Frost Doom is the mad hermit who cajoles and warns the adventurers to steer clear of the haunted mountain.  Zeke (the hermit) is a bit dubious and might be scary to you or me (though not to the pack of money crazed sociopaths that make up most adventuring parties), but he is no liar.  Avoid the scary mountain and survive!  the problem with Zeke is that he's a give away for Death Frost Doom (also reskin the cottage and tooth door), and well informed players will run when they see his untanned hide wearing figure stumbling down an icy path.


The answer to this quandary is to put Zeke somewhere else on your map and fill the whole thing with numerous mad hermit types.  Below are 20 (though with the multiple column format there are many options) insane hermits.  A domicile, name, description, obsession and secret treasure have all been provided for your random table mix and match pleasure.

Special thanks to Rey at Bum Rush the Titan! for the encouragement and table idea.

D20	Home	Name Description	Obession – Mania/ Secret Treasure
1	Nest of woven straw 10’ up a large tree	Hobnail Naked except for large boots held together by twine, elderly	Dragons/ 100’s of carved wooden gambling tokens
2	A lean to of skins and branches decorated with wind chims	Enus Scrubbed clean daily with pine boughs and cold water, chapped looking	Fairies/ A pickled sprite in a jar of brine
3	Hand dug mud cave in stream bank	Broken Bill Obese, hairy, covered in dirty scabs	The Thing in the Woods/ Rusty iron skull
4	Tepee of old flour sacks	Lilac Emaciated, lank blond hair, boil	His stolen crown/ The hilt of a noble’s sword
5	An abandoned crypt, made vaguely homey	The Stink Missing ears and nose,	The invisible masters/ Hangman’s noose
6	A windowless dry stone cairn.	The Coot Long White Beard, frayed blue robe	Perfecting martial forms/ A perfect stone sphere
7	Bark wigwam in dell of wasp hives.	No Harm Henry clothes made daily of large leaves	Complete pacifism/ Broken legged mouse
8	Walled off section under ancient bridge	Dark Drek Black robes, receding chin, foul breath	Necromancy/ Wife’s skeleton
9	Hut made of animal bones and mud.	Dungee Hide armor soaked in animal blood	Slaying the Great Beast/ Pile of animal horns
10	Overturned rowboat	Largo Knockhead Big, gladiator’s scars, one dead eye.	The city under the waves/ Seashell Collection
11	Large hollow log with moss bed, surprisingly clean and cozy	Dimby Do Skinny teenager with freckles and the wide smile of a simpleton. Farm clothes	Falling into the sky/ An old letter from his father, obvious lies.
12	Mossed covered abandoned wagon house.	The Bird Priest Ministers to animals and drunkards from roadside shrine, bald, snaggleteeth	The infiltration of the under men into society/ A moth eaten miter
13	Lopsided log cabin, badly caulked with mud and lacking a chimney	Lucky Remus Currently deceased, a ragged mummified corpse cracked buckskins	Fame and Riches/ Bark book of ramblings
14	Collapsed farmhouse, infested with rats, hidden cellar	Dirty Dirty A mockery of the dandy fashion, drunken red eyes, and gin blossoms	Witches, the pretty ones/ Primitive still and several barrels of near poison gin
15	Ancient stone circle, roofed over with saplings and ferns	The Rust Knight Burly young peasant type, has old ax wound splitting face, laughs easily	Protecting the innocent/ Collection of rust rotten metal and weapons.
16	Old Mill, now little more than a cellar pit with a plank rook	Max VonHellstien (Maxxy) Fat, jolly, laugh lines and tan complexion.  Wearing dirty linen tunic.	Saving the children/ Collection of children’s skulls
17	The cave behind a waterfall, easily spotted by scattered fish bones	Greenteeth Mossy green teeth, withered arm, wears fish skin loin cloth and monocle	The stars aligning badly/ Several bookcases of water rotten books and scrolls
18	Tidy crofters cottage hanging on edge of crumbling cliff.	Paunch Dixon Thin, middle aged, grey haired, wearing neat but threadbare merchant’s suit.  Dignified until demeanor slips.	Hallucinogenic lichens and the speaking to the rock gods/ Hallucinogenic lichens
19	Lean to beside highway.  Looks like it has been there a long time.	Faded Glory Wears cast off brightly colored scraps badly sewn together, toothless, surly.	Fictional Identity as former famous adventurer/ ancient idol of crude stone
20	Rotted silk travelling pavilion, still filled with decayed cushions	One Penny Quick talking, face twisted unnaturally. Wearing a robe of wicker matting.	Parables and similes/ A cursed book of magical lore, missing most pages