Saturday, June 9, 2012

The Obelisk - Sepulcher of Torpo the Cannibal


7g. Sepulcher of Torpo the Cannibal
A Pitch black chamber with massive white marble walls and huge bronze doors. The doors have all been recently resealed from the outside with white lead and their outer faces marked with various holy and arcane symbols. A cleric or magic-user may make a D20 roll under intelligence to recognize that these symbols are meant to obstruct the passage of supernatural entities, specifically ghosts and other non-corporeal undead.

Within the chamber the walls are carved with scenes depicting an idealized version of the rise and triumph of Torpo the Cannibal. The carvings show Torpo's humble beginnings as a baby descending from orbit, his effortless struggles against man, monster and beast and finally his benevolent rule over adoring subjects. The center of the chamber contains a massive stone bier carved into a single green rectangle wrapped with carved chains. This is Torpo's Tomb and the thick stone is a relatively indestructible, though entirely normal, 10-ton block of hard green stone polished and worked with considerable skill. The lid can be shifted (not lifted) enough to push it to the floor with a resounding crash if 45 Strength is applied to it at once (three individuals can push on the bier at once – so a block and tackle might be useful). Within the tomb is Torpo's fanged 7' tall skeleton and his grave goods. The skeleton wears rotted cloth of gold robes and a rusting iron crown (robes are worth 2GP at best, the crown is worthless). The skeleton's right hand holds a bone scroll case containing a brittle scroll that details Torpo's draconian and cruel legal system. The bottom of the bier is carpeted with electrum coins. There are 3,000 EP below Torpo's brittle bones, each oval coin is new from the mint (they were specially minted for Torpo's death) and depicts the slumbering, befanged and bearded face of the tyrant on one side and three mourning robed women on the other. There's a small chance that the coins will be recognized as dating from Torpo's reign, but otherwise they are wholly unique.

The chamber is guarded by the spirit of Torpo the Cannibal, a Hungry Ghost. Torpo's sickly blue gelatinous ectoplasmic body will shimmer into existence almost as soon as the party enters the sealed crypt, an 8' tall emaciated figure with an exaggeratedly large head, thin elongated neck and enormous fat belly. The shadows of human bones can be seen floating in Torpo's huge, distended belly. He can speak, and will make some asinine food related quip before attempting to attack and devour the PC's. If the party flees from Torpo he is trapped in the room by the magic signs around the door, unless he can talk someone into defacing them. If a door is left open and Torpo is still trapped, he will stand at the doorway and invite, in a cultured and malicious voice, any passersby to dine with him. He may also promise great rewards if he is released. Torpo knows about and can freely access the undercrypt by demanifesting his body and remanifesting below or in his bier (takes 1d4 turns), so attempts to bombard him with flaming oil or missiles while he is trapped in the sepulcher will fail. In the event Torpo's moral breaks, he is turned or he is seriously injured Totpo will flee to below.

Were he released Torpo's spirit would be able to haunt the entire graveyard and begin to gather other evil spirits around him.

The Spirit of Torpo (Hungry Ghost) - AC 5 [½ damage from normal weapons], HD 6 [May be turned], (hp 36), #AT 2, D 1D6/1D6 (+ devour), MV ('40) Save MU 6, ML 8.

1D4 Torpo's asinine, 'tasteless' quip of the moment – roll or pick.
1 “Oh wonderful! I have always preferred my meat rare – very rare!”
2 “Staying for Dinner?”
4 “It has always been my practice to serve the people!”


  1. I like the obnoxious comments table!

  2. Thanks, I have trouble thinking of witticisms on the fly. Also I wanted to capture Torpo's character - he is/was a sadistic jerk who thinks he's smarter than he actually was, hence the terrible jokes. Mostly I just wanted to use the phrase MAN BACON!

    Also Torpo is basically an optional encounter, and the 1,500 GP in treasure he has is hardly worth the near insta-death utter ruination he can rain down on most 1st level parties. Not to mention his sneaky "Not Dead yet!" gimmick.

  3. Well done adventurers- just how I like them!